Paige's Defeat

Jennifer Paige©1994

Your room is perfect

Sacred in the misty moon-glow

I’m nervous, never done this before

I can’t see your face in the darkness

You said there were candles on the windowsill

            Like in the movies

            Hopeless romantic

Their light sends the darkness scurrying away

You look so frightened and alone

Are you sure your parents aren’t home?

            You’re shaking, I am too

            Feeling suddenly and strangely new

I take your hand and your face with the other

I bury my awkward hand into the silk of your hair

The candle flickers in your eyes

            Green and full of fire

You seem so self-conscious tonight

You are so beautiful

            I love kissing you, it’s addicting

The feeling of your mouth and your tongue against mine

            Your body is driving me crazy!

            How did you become so sexy?

            Genetics?

It’s gotta be now, tonight

            Hope you’re comfortable

            ‘Cause I’m sure not

            My pulse is racing

            So loud it’s all I hear

What is it about your neck that makes me want to bite it?
The skin there is satin, so sweet

I sure hope your parents aren’t home

            Since when did these jeans fit so tight?

            I should have worn regular ones

Don’t look at me that way; it’s not really you

These jeans are cutting of my circulation

            I’ve never been this hard

I know you’re not angry, yours had to go too

Your hair is like fire against these blue sheets

Remember the homecoming bon-fire?

How you stood there in my jacket and smiled?

While the wind whipped your hair around your face?

I wanted to kiss you then

            Like I will now

            Hot, hard, passionate

Sacrificing the innocence in your eyes

Out of control but somehow I know what to do

            You taste better than the sweetest candy

            Skin of heated velvet

            Its’ scent making my senses spin wildly

Your hands on my chest feel so right

They send heat down my spine

            Between my thighs

I hate these stupid things!

“Sorry,” I say as you unhook your bra

            I know I can get it next time

There won’t be a next time ‘cause I’m gonna explode

            I have to be closer to you

            Simply pressing together our skin isn’t enough

            Inside is as close as we can possibly be

You say my name so softly I think you might want me to stop

Is that what you want?
I will, as much as I don’t want to

But it’s not what you want

            I’ve never seen you want anything less

Your legs are so long

            Caressing them, I watch you goose bump in desire

Blackness, losing myself to the subconscious mind

What seems like a ritual has begun

            As I worship your body, my altar

             I feel the welling of pain

So pure, so sharp at the base of my spine

Like a volcano about to erupt

A pressure so intense I want to cry out

            Losing all inhibitions

            Who cares if your parents are home

Nothing could ever be more right

Or more cherished than this moment

When fire and flesh meet in a rushing wave

            A catharsis so strong, yet so brief

Bright violet sparks illuminate the dark

            Of my mind

Arching, you reach for me in longing, wanton

            With your soul

Release, then an awesome exhaustion

As I roll on my side and try to sleep

But the bond that we’ve made still haunts me

            I need you still, sing to me

In the sputtering candles’ glow

I know I can never let you go

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